I was married to my ex-husband for three long years. It was just roughly three months into our marriage that I first caught him in a huge lie that threatened our livelihood. During those three years of being married to a narcissist and compulsive liar, I lost myself. I became someone I am not — snappy, rude, judgmental, angry, withdrawn, and the list goes on…
A narcissist is someone who exaggerates his or her achievements or talents, requires constant admiration, has the inability to recognize the needs of others, changes his or her identity frequently, and uses people for his or her own gain. Being with one can tear at the very fiber of who you believe you are, and cause you at times, to behave like a shadow of the person you know you can be. In fact, if you have ever been in this situation, you know that they often make you out to be, “the crazy one.” They talk themselves into believing things and situations so much, that you start to question yourself, and your own sanity.
How have I been able to move on and find myself again, and how can you? Here are 10 tips to help you pick up the pieces:
1. Get rid from Toxic Feelings
Narcissist do their best to break down individuals who have a good heart. People who generally feel for others unconditionally. Individuals who are truly in touch with emotion. You have a power, not a weakness. You have the ability to open your heart and narcissist are more likely to take advantage of this ability. In order to get over and recover from this type of toxic relationship, you must get rid of those toxic feelings that somehow replaced the good things you felt before meeting that person.
2. Talk with therapist
It’s about clearing your system of all the things they caused you to feel and the best way to do this is by journaling, talking to someone you trust and or seeing a professional. Someone who deals in the field of the mind, psychology, a therapist. Doing these things will help you gain clarity and help get rid of the haze that made you stay in a relationship full of confusion and pain.